When we Want what we cant Have…..

Greed

In my apartment, there was a picture I
had hanging on my fridge of the Talented and beautiful Jordin Sparks. She is who I admired because we had simular features. She used to be a size 16, and I used to feel proud knowing that finally there was a celebrity out there that resembled me. As most of you know…Jordin is now a comfortable size 8 and still looks amazing. So I ended up printing out her new image and placed it on my fridge as inspiration. It was there for all of 2014 until new years. New years day..many people tend to make unrealistic resolutions. I realized that her picture was unrealistic for me. I looked at myself in the mirror and realized…even when I do reach my ideal weight..I still won’t look like her. My skin is the tone of caramel…hair shoulder length…and I’m a couple inches shorter than her. So why did I want what I cant have? Why was I so focused on body features that may not have been meant for me? So about 4 weeks ago I threw her picture away…and I began to look at pictures of me instead. I stopped looking at the things I feel are flawed…and I started paying attention to the things that were beautiful. The moment I saw this woman staring back at me..the more I began to unleash insecurities from my childhood. I had to remember how far I’ve come. From a size 24 to a 14…I need to remember I’m not my pant size. So what my booty may not sit out like Nikki Minaj…but at least my body is real. It’s time we stop wanting what we can’t have..what God has for you is only for you. This goes with any aspect in your life..some of us want that man/woman in our life..that may not be for us..yet we drive ourselves crazy to get them. That job promotion that looks good…but you know it’s not something you need due to how stressful the job will be. It all comes down with being content and present with what you have now. My body is beautiful..however I can keep working out and eating healthy so that I can be the best me possible. I need to be satisfied with knowing I’m not going to look like the photoshop version of Jordin Sparks. My imperfections are perfect because that’s how God created me…so stop wanting what you can’t have..and start realizing you already have something amazing!

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