Lost and found: Restoration


So about three weeks ago, I hosted my own pity party. I decorated the walls with negative thoughts, balloons filled with doubt…and hung up my hang ups as reminders of the things I have not yet attained in life. It’s the same Ole pity party you throw yourself when you feel stuck,lost in translation,or completely behind. I find no matter your age, at some point you may begin to doubt your own talents.  I can admit, that 3 weeks ago I completely doubted my talents as an Admissions representative. I doubted my blogging. I doubted my theatre skills. Shoot, I even began to doubt the woman I am becoming. Questioning why I still live in Dallas? Why am needed here? What in the Hell am I doing here still? The routine began to drain me..work church…home. Over and over again…same hang out…same music…same folk.  Its like the wicker to my candle had been burnt out and there was No point in trying to light my fire anymore. I was so drained that all the hard work I had been putting in didn’t even matter to me anymore. I was just existing. Just breathing and taking everything for granted. Acting as if I was born to just be a drifter. Just another person to fill up some space on earth. Some of you reading this are in this space right now. You feel as if there is no purpose for you. You have hit a plateau and you can’t figure out what your next move is. What if I told you that it’s ok to be in this moment, butjust don’t set up shop and live there.   The key word here is moment. No one ever said the life you lead would be filled with all these highs. Life will take you on a ride filled with highs and lows and sometimes even moments where you are not moving at all. But it’s all apart of your journey. Own up to accepting that pity parties will happen…but they are not meant to last long. You have to get over it and acknowledge all the awesome things or people surrounding you. So how did I escape this low moment? Well I chose to. I was either going to stay stuck at my own pity party (where no one had rsvp’d)..or I was going to take a moment…breathe and get over it.  I found things that restored me. I found things that gave me a boost of hope. From bible verses, An encouraging word from friends, music to even taking a day off from work this past week. Just know that you must do something that has the potential to reignite the Fire Within you. Reintroduce yourself to that desire you have deep inside of you that tells you…you have a purpose. Take advantage of those quiet weekends at home. Re-read a book
that ignited you in the first place… Recharge your battery by truly taking time out for self.  Before you know it, you will have that spark back. All of a sudden that light that was blown out will start to flicker again, shedding the light needed to get back on the path to your next moment in life. So what…you had a sucky day, week, month..year….that’s life…it’s how you react to those low dark moments that shows you your ability to bounce back. A wise friend once told me..stop looking at your cup half empty or full and realize you have something in your cup at all.  Leave that lame pity party of yours and get over it…. reignite that fire within and allow your light to shine. No one wants to be invited to your party of doubts and negativity, so learn to be resilient and continue to press forward even when you feel as if there’s nothing left. The choice is yours.. choose wisely. The picture below is the result of what happens when you choose to reignite your passions…my next upcoming performance will be how I chose to bounce back before the end of 2015. What’s yours? Time waits for noone. Get up and Live Free.


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